Anti V-day Rant- Chapter 1

It’s that month again. That awful awful awful awful awful awful AWFUL month.

And considering 3 of my best friends’ birthdays fall in this Goddamn, manhoos-bil-manhoos, unhappiness bestowing, ghum main diboing, satyanaas- tareen month of the year I can’t even find a cubby-hole to hibernate in.

Oh how I loathe this month.

This month which would just be a normal month if those cash-grubbing, soul-selling, recession causing, Lakshmi worshipping imps of the free media didn’t cover it with red paint and red crepe paper and red helium balloons so that i-just-happen-to-be-single girls like myself feel hopelessly out of place with our yellow folders and black hand bags while non-singles dance tauntingly around us singing “Niya niya! You can’t be in our club!”

Losers. My club is a lot more fun. So there.

Why isn’t there a day to celebrate the joys of not being in love? Of not having to dish out a couple of thousand rupees on gifts the guy/girl will probably show off to his/her friends then throw at the back of his/her cupboard. Or return when the relationship’s over.

How come there isn’t a day to celebrate freedom? Happy Non-commitment Day. It sounds good to me. How about celebrating it this 10th of  March?

By the way, it’s the third of this month. Expect rants like this throughout February. Before the 14th because I’ll be groaning about the insane amount of red hearts I see everywhere; and after the 14th because I’ll be groaning about how (once again) I received no valentine cards, or chocolates or even those lame smses that people send each other to make their single-dom a lot more bearable. If I were you, I’d stay clear of this particular blog all through February.

24 Responses to “Anti V-day Rant- Chapter 1”
  1. Pinky says:

    hahaha, well let me express my solidarity with ur cause (because no one sends me anything, not even a PKR 15/- rose bud)

    ohhh IDEA…lets launch a smear campaign, typical Taliban style…condemning the blind following of west, moral decadence of youth, degeneration of societal values, blah blah…killer idea, nahin? 😛

  2. dude… i didnt even KNOW it was going to be V day.

    You don’t need a stupid month to tell you, you are loved.

  3. aarushi says:

    Love the Happy Non-Commitment day :), or Liberation-from-emotionally-draining-relationships day
    or just plain Freedom day

  4. farooqk says:

    You are going through a midlife crisis long before your actual midlife! 😛

  5. Rashid says:

    farooq, hahahaha! your comment is like ,dariya ko koozay mey band karna

  6. Anas Imtiaz says:

    I totally subscribe to the idea of non-commitment day, start a campaign! 😀

    Reminds me of an incident when I went to book a place in a restaurant for a small celebration of friends. The manager refused to book a place saying “its 14th feb, i can’t book you in” and i asked innocently “why not???” … took me some time to realise what the hell he was talking about.

    btw..the month isn’t so bad 🙂

  7. I hate Valentines Day! I m in! EYUCK! Hey can a engaged guy join the non-commitment day?!

    But I kinda like February! just 28 Days! My Pay Day comes early! (Actually my father’s pay day comes early but lets not get into details, yes?)

  8. MAK says: its all about “a” card….why don’t u buy one for urself.beside who can love u more than urself. atleast u are not going to throw it in ur cupboard.

    i just miss one festival in this month…Basant.

    As for the freedom day count me in….

  9. karachiwali says:

    if an engaged guy would be allowed to join the non-commitment day, i should be allowed too!

  10. Anas Imtiaz says:

    NO, and I repeat NO, engaged people. That is against the true spirit of this club (which isn’t formed yet) 😀

  11. hahah we have a non-committed people club forming?

  12. Rashid says:

    by the way hira, what’s wrong in commitment?

  13. Hira S. says:

    LOL! in the end it’s always about the cards, presents in the stockings, choorian and compliments, isn’t it? It sucks being Muslim during a Christian event, uninvited guest at a party or single on a couple’s day. It’s basically about fitting in.

    And yeah, and we should form a club. And tomato supposedly happily committed people. i get the first shot at Rashid.
    dude, i don’t have a problem with commitments. I just wish being single was appreciated more.

  14. Rashid says:

    tomatoes. hehe. Are not tomatoes expensive?.Alhamdolillah pretty happy with her. Though it’s not a fairy tale. We both have paid a heavy price to earn happiness. When you have a partner who stands beside you though thick and thin then even Allah gets ready to help you out and brings things in your favor. I know it because I personally experienced it(Ab nazar na laga deyna 😛 )

    IMO being single is not fun at all. Commitment is like a challenge and I love challenges a lot.

  15. farooqk says:

    did anyone ask rashid about his marital life?!!! oh well… 😛

  16. jinkibachi says:

    i had no idea that even tomatoes can strike that hard on ur head…hira,use egg or lemon next time 😉

  17. Man I hate commitment!

    I think I should put “I hate…” in one of my function keys as a short stroke! If I could get away with it I d be single all my life! Ahhh well, We always want things we cant have.

  18. Hira S. says:

    dude. once again. won’t marry you :P.

  19. Rashid says:

    farook!hira tempted me. 🙂

    dinky ..beech me tumhara tapakna zarori hay? :0)

    safi so your fiance forced you to get hooked with her? why are you whining after engagement? 🙂

    hiraS: muj sey kaha aap ney kuch???

  20. No my fiance did nt, but my parents kinda did! And I ll keep on whinning about it, commitment that is!

    Committment is too damn over rated and boring, Why should I take someone for granted and why should that person take me for granted? Why? cuz we signed a paper? Agreed to society’s damn traditions? Or we were just the sorry lot who did nt have anything better to do?

    Committment should be to a cause, a greater good, (or evil, in my case) or something ideal and larger than life itself or at least damn good to just think about!

    what I ll be committed to would be my word and promise! Cuz I dont believe in love or any of that bullshit!

  21. Rashid says:

    hmmm. You have a point.

    “what I ll be committed to would be my word and promise! ”

    Well, Love is actually a sugar-coated term for the things you have mentioned. 🙂

    Bhai shadi k baad baray baro ki definitions badal jatin hain. abhi tu tum sirf mangni shuda ho. Women have got tendency to change men entirely, trust me. Now it’s your luck that you get a positive change or negative one. 🙂

  22. The point was commitment is over rated and just based on a few words that may not even have any meaning at all nor any worth.

    As for change, I dont know about the future nor can I withstand any change that is to come. But the thing with change is that when you need to change something, you need to change yourself as well, in short it comes both ways!

    Let wait and see.

    As far as the mungni and shadi is concerned, I tend not to think about it… I cross that bridge when the time comes.

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