The chocolate days…

I cannot sit on the library floor anymore. If I wasn’t penniless I would have said “screw the Rs.500 fine, I’m sitting right where I want to!” but I can’t afford rebellion. Damn.

I’ve started work on my print, my first weaving sample is complete and I think I can manage to pass in CAD/CAM. I’m not going to drive myself crazy like I did last year. It’s good to be work-conscious but you shouldn’t make it your top-priority, because in the end you won’t remember the crazy amount of effort you put in, you’ll remember the fun you had. And I didn’t have fun last year at all. Even in first year, I remember the sheer excitement and joy of our newborn freedom, of having friends, of being a part of this vibrant, beautiful place with a lake and a walkway and a fertilizer factory cum cruise ship that sparkled in the night; the only assignments I remember doing are the ones where Awzeen, Shazia, Mariam, Mutahira and I were cramped together in our hostel rooms trying to paint perfect, strokeless strips of paper, or reproducing magazine cutouts using poster color. I remember the night before Valentines Day when we had a mini-competition on who would get the first Valentine sms, and Mutahira went crazy and started cussing all the guys she knew for being insensitive, careless assholes. I think Awzeen won…I’m not sure. I know I certainly didn’t.

Nothing is the same anymore. A lot of people we loved have graduated, and the ones that are left…well we don’t have any time to spend with them. I’m a stranger now to the people I’ve been friends with since the first day of university. I could blame it on the Administration. They’ve killed the hostel night-life, they’ve made sure that we have no time whatsoever to have fun, they’ve given the cafeteria over to a group that can’t cook at all…Nope, not enough reasons. Sigh. Since I can’t really blame it on the Administration, I’ll have to blame it on myself. We have to learn to take out time for the people who are important to us. If I can’t do that, it’s my own fault.

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